Time to Run

This past summer, I did less running than I normally do. It was for reasons that I've written about here before. If I'm being honest, summer is not actually my favorite time of the year to train anyway. I usually train through the Winter in order to peak for races in spring. In fact, I had probably one of the best racing seasons ever this year with a solid effort in a prestigious 50-miler and a win in a 6-hour race. The thing about putting in the effort over the winter and then reaping the rewards in races is this: you kind of feel like you deserve a reward after it all.

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it's okay to not be okay

Summer came and went and I'm not gonna lie, it was a toughie. There were times over the past two-and-a-half months when I was so catatonically depressed, I could barely get out of bed, never mind post blogs. I stopped running, writing, socialising, and basically being me. I could have posted my journal ramblings but that would have meant blacking out all the swear words and the negativity that seemed to be consuming me. I have endured much in my life and always charged at it with a never-ever-quit kind of evangelism. This time was radically different because all hope seemed to be gone.

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The White Lie Myth.

White lies, we all tell 'em. Or do we? Ten years ago, I was living in London and working as a manger in a swanky Notting Hill restaurant. I was up to my eyes in cocaine and alcohol and lying became part of the job—it didn't have to be, but being an addict is a secretive life. Whether it was lying to my dealer, my boss and staff, or my closest friends, I didn't think of it as anything earth-shattering. After a prolonged period it became almost like a game, how much deception can I juggle before I get caught out? Well, I got busted more times than I can remember.

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The Frustrations of Faith.

In August 2012, I was standing in my church with my eyes closed, praying for physical and emotional healing. I got both, and a whole lot more. It took me a few weeks to figure it all out, but it was my “come to Jesus moment.” And boy it was like nothing I'd ever felt before. The concept of a relationship with Jesus is enough to turn a lot of people away from not just church, but Him, and they lose out on so much in doing so. The beginning of this relationship was like the start of an amazing romance, really!

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Powering Down.

Annoyed, impatient, anxious, envious. That was pretty much my mood at the beginning of the week. I had said to my wife in the middle of March that April would be a reset month for me. No book launch, no ultra-marathon, no promotional work to do. I anticipated time away from the Internet and more time outdoors with the good weather arriving, and yet, there I sat on Monday afternoon wanting to throw my iPhone at the wall and just step out of the world for a while.

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